Daddy Issues: Ready for Love

How do a woman know when she’s ready for love? Is it possible to let go of all the hurt, anger and rejection produced by previous relationships and/or the absence of her father in her childhood and allow herself to become completely vulnerable and open to be loved? It’s possible! I don’t care what you’ve been led to believe, all men ARE NOT the same. If you believe so, the problem is you. I’ve been hurt, lied to, cheated on, and my father was in and out of my life until he died when I was only 13 years old. The theories that I created about men, love, and myself left me lonely and confused but forced me to get to the root of the problem… ME!

When HE Has Trust Issues...

I've talked about women not knowing how to let a man love them, but I've noticed a lot of men don't know how to be loved as well. It's so hard trying to be with a man that has been through a lot and been hurt so many times that he thinks everybody is out to get him. It doesn't matter what you do to show him that you're different, he won't let you in. You start to become frustrated wondering if it's something you've done or said. Maybe even consider leaving because you feel like a stranger in your own home. Like most women, men have trust issues and barriers built in attempt to refrain from being hurt. I think it's 10 times worst for men because they've adopted this hardcore mentality so they think they aren't supposed to show emotions.

A Threesome?... No Thank You!

During a conversation with an old friend, threesomes came up. Yes, like Ménage à 3! I’ve never had a threesome and he said he’s had a couple, I was flabbergasted. Let’s be honest, at some point in our lives, we’re all curious. Now, I know I couldn’t go through with something like this for several reasons… but the questions wouldn’t stop coming and when the conversation was over, I thought of more questions I wanted to ask. Whose idea was it? Were you in a relationship with any of them? Do you need multiple women to satisfy you sexually? I had questions galore! I mean, I’m a writer… yes, I’m nosey!

Reality TV... The New Poison

I think the first reality television show I watched was Laguna Beach then The Hills. Lauren Conrad was like Barbie to me, it seemed as if she had everything. Even back then, I wondered just how REAL these shows were because to a kid from the projects, their lives were perfect. I mean, they whined and cried because their dad took the keys to their Range Rovers while we worried about eating dinner or having clean clothes for school! I used to think “put us on MTV, we can show them ‘REALITY’!” Today, the only shows on nearly every television network at primetime is some reality series. My question is how does this affect us individually and as a community?

Missing Trey

When I met Trey, I was involved. The guy I was dating had me on an emotional roller coaster. When it was good, it was great but when it was bad, it was ugly. There were days I didn’t know if I was coming or going. Foolishly in love, I had settled for whatever it was this man and I had. After standing by silently and allowing me to cry on his shoulder for months, Trey said, “Why do you keep letting him put you through that? Give me a chance to show you how you deserve to be treated?” The following week we went on a date and became practically inseparable. Slowly, this other guy was becoming a distant memory. Trey was like a knight in shining armor, rescuing me from myself. He treated me with the utmost respect and taught me how to treat a man. Everything was fresh and fun. We had petty arguments like all couples but nothing felt forced, it just flowed.

She's So Petty

Some women can be obnoxiously outspoken and overly opinionated. I’ll take a moment to apologize now because some of you may get offended, if you’re one of these women, you’re childish. Who has time to point out every negative detail in someone’s Instagram post or deliberately embarrass another person by airing their personal business to their many followers? There’s a saying that says: “What Sally says about Suzie, says more about Sally,” This couldn’t be any truer. Cattiness is a female trait but this new generation of women are PETTY... It's ridiculous!

Because of You (poem)

It’s because of you I am woman, you’re the reason I’m unafraid.

I now take chances fearlessly, for you’ve taught me to be brave

Your love, it fuels my confidence and kills all insecurities,