Missing Trey

When I met Trey, I was involved. The guy I was dating had me on an emotional roller coaster. When it was good, it was great but when it was bad, it was ugly. There were days I didn’t know if I was coming or going. Foolishly in love, I had settled for whatever it was this man and I had. After standing by silently and allowing me to cry on his shoulder for months, Trey said, “Why do you keep letting him put you through that? Give me a chance to show you how you deserve to be treated?” The following week we went on a date and became practically inseparable. Slowly, this other guy was becoming a distant memory. Trey was like a knight in shining armor, rescuing me from myself. He treated me with the utmost respect and taught me how to treat a man. Everything was fresh and fun. We had petty arguments like all couples but nothing felt forced, it just flowed.

Tuesday, May 10^th – Trey decided he’d go down to Tallahassee to spend a few days with his mother and grandmother so he’d be home in Atlanta with me on Sunday (Mother’s Day). I felt like it should’ve been the other way around, but after a brief disagreement, he won. I had just started a new job so us taking the trip together wasn’t an option. That night, I stayed the night at his place because he’d be leaving the following day. We were up all night talking about everything. I told him I believed he was brought into my life to teach me how to be loved. He gave me a promise ring and told me I deserved a man like him, one who loved me and treated me like a queen. Then he made me promise to never settle like I did with the guy before him.

Wednesday, May 11^th – While I showered to prepare for work, Trey snuck out to get my favorite oatmeal from McDonalds. After dropping me off at work and kissing me Good-Bye, he headed for Tallahassee, who knew that would be the last kiss? Throughout the day we laughed and joked about how he should’ve gotten me a baby-sitter and how he had better not let his childhood friends get him into any trouble while he was away.

2:11 a.m. Thursday, May 12^th – Trey’s ringtone, Leona Lewis’ ‘I Will Be’, emitted from my cellphone. I answered sleepily, “You missed your two o’clock curfew,” I joked

Then I heard “I’m sorry for calling you so late.”

It was Trey’s dad. Immediately sensing something was wrong, I began to panic. My mouth was suddenly dry and I couldn’t speak.

“Trey and his friends were struck by a drunk driver, Trey didn’t make it.”

Talk about an out-of-body experience! I heard him, but I couldn’t comprehend what he said. Within the next few hours two of my friends called, one with relationships problems, the other with car trouble. Never going back to sleep, I got up at six a.m. and went to work. I was emotionally numb. Why didn’t he go when I wanted him to? Nothing made sense to me, I couldn’t understand why God had given him to me, just to take him away. I knew better than to question God’s motive, I just didn’t understand. What Trey promised would be the best day in my life, turned out to be the worst. I was so angry, I couldn’t cry or talk about it, even at his funeral, I just fainted. One day in July, while at work, it hit me like a ton of bricks! He was never returning from Florida because some selfish idiot decided he was a better drunk driver than sober one. All of those tears I had been suppressing came at once. After that, every guy I met, I compared to Trey.

A year in a half later:

I learned some of the most important lessons about being a woman and love from Trey. He taught me that what one man doesn’t appreciate, another will. I learned how to be loved and how to let a man, be the man in the relationship. When his life was taken recklessly, I felt cheated out of my happily ever after. There isn’t a day goes by that he doesn’t cross my mind but I know everything happens for a reason so I’m blessed to have known him. Now that I know how to love and how to be loved, I’m ready. Not rushing, just blogging while waiting patiently for my Mr. Right.

I’m a relatively private person but I shared this because we don’t often appreciate people in our lives until it’s too late… Life’s short. Live, love, and laugh. I know that’s cliché but its REAL… True love exist and there’s a Prince Charming out there for all of us... Two if we're lucky!

Sincerely,

F.C.